🎾 BO KNOWS… PICKLEBALL 🎾
Bo Jackson, former NFL and MLB legend, has just been permanently banned from his local pickleball league after amassing an undefeated record of 532-0 — and several restraining orders from terrified retirees.
According to reports, Bo:
🔥 Showed up to his first match wearing neon Nike cross-trainers, a flak jacket, and carrying a duffel bag labeled “Paddle Damage.”
🔥 Claimed he trained by hitting pickleballs off a moving freight train.
🔥 Served his first point so hard it disintegrated the paddle of the opponent mid-block.
🔥 Was frequently overheard muttering: “Bo don’t dink. Bo dominates.”
🔥 Asked to sub in for the opponent’s partner once — and then beat himself 11-0 out of sheer boredom.
🔥 During timeouts, lifted the net and did squats with it.
🔥 Argued with line judges when calls went in his favor, just to keep it competitive.
The league tried to intervene after match 401, but Bo returned their cease-and-desist letter… overhand.
By match 500, local chiropractors reported an uptick in whiplash cases, all traced back to people watching Bo’s serves.
🏓 The league has since rewritten the rules:
No neon gear
No Bo Jackson
📉 HOA reports league enrollment is up 300% — but only because people want to say they lost to Bo before he was banned.
🏆 Bo Knows… Pickleball.